Somehow, if an artist has enough shock value, he/she/it will blow the ever loving crap out of the musical tastemakers and acquire a massive following of teens trapped in adult bodies, alike charismatic politicians or Jason Cameron post-Avatar. In case you haven’t read the title, since you’re obviously too busy with your important and exciting life and just happened upon this post on your way to the military state of internet-importance, today we’re talking about the demigod of hype and double standards; M.I.A.
Now, if you’ve read my thoughts on OFWGKTA, you’ll have learned the hard way that I live and breathe cynicism like there’s no tomorrow. Still, I’m normally all for changing the world to a better place, especially as I can’t see it getting much worse, but once you jump off the SS Idealist, for the sake of swimming in the endless seas of major label cash it traverses, you might as well have just painted a giant bullseye on your forehead for all the despicable beings such as myself to aim at.
Madame Controversy herself seems to have noticed that no single aspect of her musical style has enough format or depth to carry anything with a mass exceeding a feather in zero gravity. Hence she will clusterfuck you with “experimental” instruments, political them-…. unresolved childhood issues, disguised as politically charged lyrics, in a veil so thin that even a professional runway model would consider it ghastly, and a voice, remastered to the point that it somehow caused my ears to exhume anatomically impossible amounts of pure, undistilled diarea, first time I heard that one hit sampling automated rifles. The visual representation of the sonic nightmare, pictured above, is likely to give any concertgoer eleven kinds of epilepsy, before the first chorus has violated your ears, and it’s more than certain, that the aforementioned masochist of a concertgoer will be able to play a succesfull game of political-imagery-cliché-bingo, using nothing but her various outfits. But, if you trust music critics, she’s the patron saint of world peace through music and her message is as pure and divine as it’s controversial and trendsetting, which is essentially Not. One. Fucking. Bit.
As is usually the trend with internet sensations, she’s been hailed as one of the most influential and important musicians of her decade, thus supposedly M.I.A. owns the 00’s, which, if true, has killed my faith in humanity’s cultural development. Thankfully, the blogosphere somehow collectively revised it’s position on Maya, when she went too far with her “creative direction” on her latest album, aptly titled MAYA, which has had the same effect on her career as heavy artillery bombardement on a kindergarten during naptime. She also has an immense fondness for bashing other artist. I’m guessing it’s a trick to achieve more underground cred, with her sticking it to the man and all, but it all gets a little confusing once you take her own lifestyle and image into account. Mind you, she is the proud owner of a fanbase, so rampant that it’s the only one I can imagine, that could ever rival that of Jensen Ackles. Hence I will be camping out in my local nuclear shelter for the coming weeks.